Saturday, January 20, 2007

Why My Wife Never Pumps Her Own Gas

20 Richest Female Entertainers

1. Oprah Winfrey
2. J.K. Rowling
3. Martha Stewart
4. Madonna
5. Celine Dion
6. Mariah Carey
7. Janet Jackson
8. Julia Roberts
9. Jennifer Lopez
10. Jennifer Aniston
11. The Olsen Twins (when do they finally get treated as two people)
12. Britney Spears
13. Judge Judy
14. Sandra Bullock
15. Cameron Diaz
16. Gisele Bundchen (Victoria Secret model)
17. Ellen DeGeneres
18. Nicole Kidman
19. Christina Aguilera
20. Renee Zellweger

Source: Forbes

I would have thought the largest number would have come from the film industry but just as many came from TV and music (6 from each). Truly amazing is that 4 member of the top 20 are under age 30. Unlike the male list, there are no athletes. Women in sport have a long way to go to catch up to men when it comes to income.

I never attract a crowd when I go shopping

...but Victoria Beckham sure does.

She came home with 7 full suitcases. Puts my wife to shame.

Friday, January 19, 2007

Fallout from the Lebanese War

The Israeli failure in Lebanon this past summer has rested squarely on the heads of Prime Minister Ehud Olmert, Defense Minister Amir Peretz and Israel Defense Forces Chief of Staff Dan Halutz . For months now Israelis have been calling for all three to resign. This week General Halutz submitted his resignation. There was a Commission set up to review the war and he had indicated he would resign if it found him guilt of malfeasance. Though the Commission hasn't yet released its findings, I'm sure he has some idea of what it will say. He found it more convenient to remove himself before the other shoe dropped so to speak. Once one of the Top Three Incompetents (Halutz, Olmert and Peretz) goes, there is much more pressure on the other two to go as well. And make no mistake, there is already pressure on Olmert to do so.

Lindsay Lohan on Way To Rehab

Humane Executions

Just a comment of the executions this week in Iraq. One of the condemned men didn't follow the script. The rope popped the head off of Barzan Ibriham, Hussein's half-brother, as he descended through the gallows.

The reason I bring it up is that I was struck by this response in the AP story:

"Government spokesman Ali al-Dabbagh said the gallows were built to international standards and in accordance with human rights organizations."

I'd like to know what human rights organizations publish guidelines on humanely hanging people from the neck.

Wednesday, January 17, 2007

Impact of Global Warming

Some People Get Quicker Roadside Assistance

What Would You Do With $200 Billion?

The New York Times put the cost of the war in Iraq in an interesting perspective. Below is a chart illustrating alternative program spending if those funds were freed up.

click on chart to enlargen

Update on Bad Smells

Earlier I reported on a skunk who hitched a ride to Canada from California. Wildlife officials are still looking for a driver who would take the poor fella back home. If you're interested, you can call the hotline at 416-631-0662.


Also an update on the James Brown burial watch. It's day 23 and I haven't heard that he has been buried yet. His body continues to lie in a sealed casket in his home in South Carolina.

Beginning to wonder which smells worse.

Portland Demolition Derby

So you think driving has been bad in your neck of the wood. This was taken in Portland. This is what happens when you combine a hill, ice and dumb drivers who think they can drive on anything. Enjoy the video!

Ever wonder what the serve at McDonalds in India?

I don't think they have meat on the menu. Just chicken and vegetarian items which probably means a healthier menu than in North America.

2 Grilled chicken patties with a smoke-flavoured mayonnaise, fresh onions, tomatoes, processed cheddar cheese in a toasted sesame seeded bun.

A rich Béchamel eggless sauce mixed with exotic vegetables like broccoli, baby corn, mushrooms, red capsicum and freshly baked on rectangular spiced bread with a cheese topping.



Tuesday, January 16, 2007

Pillow Fight League Video

For some reason I thought this would be in poor taste and degrading to women. But after 4 beers it's not too bad.


Sasha Baron Cohen at the Golden Globes

Pillow Fight League


I didn't realize this existed in Toronto but there is a Pillow Fight League where women battle each others with - pillows. I guessed I missed the media article last spring. Not only is there a website but a blog too.

What once was the sweet dominion of teen sleepovers -- and dirty old men's dreams -- has been torqued, redefined and marketed into a flashy show that spectators pay a $12 cover charge to see.

Welcome to the Pillow Fight League, which has been drawing growing crowds in Toronto since it formed early last year, and is now set to export the concept to drunk patrons in other cities including New York.

The league is the brainchild of 38-year-old Stacey Case, a T-shirt printer and musician who came up with the idea that people would pay to see young women in costumes beat the tar out of each other with pillows -- and that women would volunteer to whap each other in front of a crowd. He is the Commission of the PFL.

Though I love the names of the fighters: Sarah Bellum (I guess the smart one), Boozy Suzy (not the sober one), Betty Clock'er, Polly Esther, and Persian Princess.

Degrading? Maybe. So I should do check it out and report back.

Burger Battle Brewing Between Texas and Connecticut

A burger battle is brewing between a Texas state legislator and the owners of a restaurant who claim the hamburger was invented in New Haven, Connecticut. With the new session of the Texas legislature now under way, Republican State Rep. Betty Brown has proposed a resolution declaring Athens, Texas, the original home of the hamburger. Brown, an Athens resident, says that a long-ago resident of the town had a luncheonette in the late 1880s and sold the first burgers there. Those claims are not sitting well with Ken Lassen Sr., 89, the third-generation owner of New Haven eatery Louis' Lunch, established in 1895. He says his grandfather came up with the first hamburger there.

Who am I question what the Texas legislature should be spending its time on. I've never been to Texas so maybe they lead all other states in literacy, eliminating poverty, controlling the border, etc., so their legislators need issues to address. And there is nothing more American than a juicy burger with fries.

So to help Rep. Brown out I've done some research. It seems it's impossible to establish the origin of the hamburger.

The descendants of the Menches Brothers, who now operate a small chain in Ohio called, not surprisingly, Menches Bros. claim that their great-grandfather and his brother (Charles and Frank, respectively) invented the dish at an 1885 fair in Hamburg, New York.

Some guy named Charlie Nagreen supposedly started selling meatballs at the age of 15 at the summer fair in Seymour, Wisconsin. He realized people could take this meal with them if he simply smashed the meat together between two pieces of bread and called it a "hamburger" . Also Seymour has a Hamburger Hall of Fame.

Finally, McDonald's Corporation historians have researched the issue and claim the inventor was an unknown food vendor at the St. Louis Fair in 1904. This food vendor is most likely Fletcher Davis also known as "Old Dave" or "Uncle Fletch". Fletcher operated a café at 115 Tyler Street on the north side of the courthouse square in Athens, Texas in the late 1880's.

This is making me hungry. I'm heading out for lunch.

Caught in a Kahn Game

The latest convert to the Conservative Party would appear to have some serious explaining to do about his dubious financing practices when he was running as a Liberal in the last two elections. It seems Elections Canada revoked the legal registration of new Conservative MP Wajid Khan's former Liberal riding association in December because it failed to file financial returns for 2004 and 2005.

The returns, now available at Elections Canada, show that Mr. Khan, whose defection to the Conservative party was announced by Prime Minister Stephen Harper less than two weeks ago, lent his old riding association a total of $179,946 through his Toronto car dealership during the two years covered by the late returns. The transactions suggest Mr. Khan was using his car dealership as the primary source of funding for his election campaigns. It appears the riding association still owes the car dealership a sizable sum of money and it it is unable to pay back the loan then the money is considered a campaign contribution and exceeds legal limits.

This is likely to turn Prime Minister Harper's coup into a total embarrassment. It partly dumps a Liberal mess into the Conservative's laps though I wouldn't let the Liberals off the hook. Would be funny if Kahn is expelled from the Tory caucus. Now when is that much heralded Kahn report on the Middle East going to be released.

Monday, January 15, 2007

The Apprentice LA - Episode 2

This season is seriously flawed and it's just the second episode! Now, I know I watched the premiere. In that premiere, the teams had no names. I know they didn't. The caption on the screen referred to "Heidi's team" or "Frank's team." Tonight, with no discussion, the teams suddenly have names as if they had them all along. What's up with that? Heidi's team is Kinetic while the losing team is named Arrow. And the show has become so shallow. The winners of last night's task went to the Playboy mansion to meet Hugh Hefner. Like get real.

On the Arrow team, Nicole became the Project Manager while Heidi retained her position on the Kinetic team. Just like last week, it was very obvious which team was having problems. On Arrow, Carey threw himself into the task; he always wanted to design. Michelle spoke up against his teensy pink bikini brief shorts for men, and the guys on the team rolled their eyes, too. But Carey was adamant and persuasive. Carey, who's gay, was obviously thinking the gay market, but not the big picture. And, the men's suit line is what killed their bid to win the task.

In the boardroom, Carey tried to target Michelle (who is the only one who really spoke up about not liking the teensy suit). Trump made it clear it was the teensy pink suit which killed their chances to win, but thinks his own body is so great that he could get away wearing it just like Carey did while modeling it on the runway. Yeah, right! Of course Carey gets fired.

Finally, Ivanka Trump is as full of herself as her dad. But she definitely has better hair.

Talking to Americans

I left a post today on a blog based in Texas called Liberally Lean From The Land of Dairy Queen. Got quite a reaction from some of the locals. So I thought I would post some of the comments. By the way my post only had to do with the weather.

Canada! What a bunch of spineless WUSSIES!

How is that socialized health insurance working out for ya, eh?

Just guessing, It probably takes a while to see the doc, but you can always enjoy the cheap prescription drugs while you're waiting!!

Here, take these vicoden and enjoy the buzz and we will see you in a couple of months and check out that heart attack.

I hope you don't let a little heart attack get in the way of your freedom. Whenever Islamic fanatics start blowing up your cities, call your doctor and make an appointment.

You see, Liberalism is a mental disease. Canadian liberals are just as ignorant as American liberals.

Kinda makes you want to rush down and enjoy that southern hospitality.


Man Rides Stationary Bike for 85 Hours; Ends up Late for Work

George Hood may have pedaled his way into the Guinness Book of World Records on Saturday night. Hood took a few brief power naps along the way. Guinness Book rules allow a five-minute break for every completed hour of cycling.

The 49-year-old Aurora, Illinois resident began riding a stationary bike at the Five Seasons Sports Club at 4 a.m. Wednesday and surpassed the previous record of 82 hours by 8:28 p.m. Saturday. He stopped several minutes before midnight after completing his goal of 85 hours.

When he completed his ride he was surprised to see that he was still at the Five Seasons and not in front of his office at the Drug Enforcement Administration. Hood stated it was is intention to become more fit by biking to work. The federal law enforcement agency later put Hood on suspension and are investigating a rather sizable shortage of seized illegal drugs. Meanwhile the Guinness people will get back to George.

U.S. Retracts Canadian Spy Coins Claim

I reported a few days ago that Canadian $2 coins were being used for to commit industrial espionage. Well the claim has now been retracted.

A U.S. government defence agency has suddenly retracted its claim that Canadian coins containing tiny transmitters were planted on at least three American contractors who visited Canada.

However, Canadian currency is not fully in the clear yet. There have been unsubstantiated claims that there may be issues with the Canadian $20 bill. A number of Americans claim that when they have left a Canadian $20 bill out in the open, Queen Elizabeth's eyes follow them around the room. Yvonne Diseronto of Cleveland was reported to be quite upset when she caught a $20 bill watching her undress. The same Virginia-based Defense Security Service is investigating the latest allegation.

Al Gore is Banned in Schools

It seems that Al Gore's film "Inconvenient Truth", one of the top-grossing documentaries in U.S. history, has been banned in Federal Way schools in Washington state. A parent who supports the teaching of creationism and opposes sex education complained about the film so the School Board placed what it labeled a moratorium on showing the film.

"Condoms don't belong in school, and neither does Al Gore. He's not a schoolteacher," said Frosty Hardison, a parent of seven who also said that he believes the Earth is 14,000 years old. " School Board members adopted a three-point policy that says teachers who want to show the movie must ensure that a "credible, legitimate opposing view will be presented," that they must get the OK of the principal and the superintendent, and that any teachers who have shown the film must now present an "opposing view."

I did know that creationists also don't believe in global warming. See you learn something new every day. Anyway, my crystal ball sees a lot of litigation for Federal Way in their future. And it will likely drag on longer than the 7 days it took to create the earth unless they have some divine intervention.


Drive Home Should Be Worse


blue is snow
green is rain
pink is the bad stuff - freezing rain, ice pellets

Winter Hits Toronto

Freezing rain, ice pellets and snow all at once. Someone is trying to make up for lost time.

Sunday, January 14, 2007

Procrastination

Doomsday Clock Adjusted for Daylight Savings Time

The Doomsday Clock, the symbolic timepiece maintained by the Bulletin of Atomic Scientists to indicate the planets' relative proximity to global catastrophe, received an unexpected adjustment yesterday when the scientists realized they had never moved the clock back an hour on October 29 in accordance with Daylight Savings Time.

"Bad on us," said head scientist Carl Yonner. "It was (physicist) Helga Von Donner's turn to remember. She totally blew it, blamed it on some new theory of relativity she was working on. German cow."

The new time on the Doomsday clock is therefore 10:53, not 11:53.

"God, this is embarrassing," continued Yonner. "We're all running around like Chicken-freaking-Littles and it turns out we've got some breathing room. I guess we can quit our incessant yapping for a bit. In fact, I'm taking a f$#king cruise. All this sitting around waiting for humanity to implode is emotionally draining."

City Makes It Illegal to Smoke in Cars; Sex is Still OK

The Bangor, Maine City Council approved a measure last week that prohibits people from smoking in vehicles when children are present.

When the law goes into effect next week, Bangor will become the first municipality in Maine to have such a law. Similar statewide measures have been adopted in Arkansas and Louisiana and are under consideration in several other states.

People who smoke with children present in the confined space of a car or truck might as well be deliberately trying to kill those children, said City Councilor Patricia Blanchette, who is a smoker.

However, City Council confirmed that underage sex in the backseat of cars will not be banned in the forseeable future. Provided the vehicle is parked and condoms are used.

Chad Vadar - Chapter 1

I'm now appearing in a video series. Not sure if I like the way I'm being portrayed.

David Beckham's Contract


It seems that David Beckham's contract with the L.A. Galaxy will not necessarily make him the highest paid athlete in the world. The Galaxy will pay him $250 million for the next 5 years .Though it will easily make him the highest paid athlete when considering on-field activities only. Last year Beckham was paid about $24 million in endorsements.



According to Forbes the highest paid athlete in the past year was PGA superstar Tiger Woods at about $87 million. He just had his best year on the tour and earned $10 million in winnings. His endorsement deals include Nike, Buick and American Express.




Michael Schumacher, the top racing driver in the world earned about $60 million including endorsements. Ferrari paid him a salary of about $40 million last year. Schumacher retired from racing at the end of last season.





NFL quarterback Michael Vicks earned about $38 million in the past year. Vicks was the first African-American quarterback selected first overall in the NFL draft and is a huge fan favourite. He just broke the NFL rushing record for a quarterback. He signed a 10-year, $130 million contract in 2004. His endorsement deals include Nike and Coke.






There is still some big money being made in boxing. Oscar De La Hoya earned a total of $38 million in the past year as he reaches the end of his career.




Shaquille O'Neal edged out retired NBA star Michael Jordan as the highest paid basketball player at $34 million. O'Neal signed a 5-year, $100 million contract in 2005. Jordan earns slightly less even though he retired in 2003. He still has lots of money coming his way, in particular from Nike.




Alex Rodriguez is the highest paid major league baseball player at $32 million earnings. His 10-year, $250 million contract in 2000 is still baseball's richest as he enters the 7th year. A-Rod's Yankee teammate and rival Derek Jeters is next on the baseball salary scale with $26 million in earnings.




The top paid tennis player is Andre Agassi with $26 million in total earnings. He was a long term client of Nike but recently switched to Addidas.




The highest paid female athlete is tennis player Maria Sharapova who earned about $19 million in the past year. Most of her earnings also comes form endorsement but she made almost $4 million in court winnings during the past season. Her endorsement deals include Nike and Tag Heuer watches.


I noticed most of the top paid athletes are pimping for Nike. No hockey player is even close to these figures. Couldn't find his numbers but I'm guessing that retired star Wayne Gretzky is still the game's highest earner.