Friday, November 14, 2008

EMA Firefighters Guide ( The UFO Chapter )


The following is a excerpt from the official FEMA Manual (Chapter 13).

WARNING

"Near approaches of UFOs can be harmful to human beings. Do not stand under a UFO that is hovering at low altitude. Do not touch or attempt to touch a UFO that has landed. In either case the safe thing to do is to get away from there very quickly and let the military take over. There is a possibility of radiation danger and there are known cases where persons have been burned by rays emanating from UFOs. Don't take chances with UFOs!" In view of the federal law (cited earlier) empowering NASA's administrator to impound, without a hearing, anyone who touches a UFO or its occupants.?

UFO HAZARDS

"The two principal hazards noted with relation to UFOs have been attributed to powerful electrical fields which they can project in a general or localized area and the psychological effects they have produced on the general populace or individual contacts."

"Besides the possible physical effects of approaching a UFO, e.g.. burns, radiation, etc., there may be psychological effects produced by force fields that could induce a hypnotic state in the viewer, loss of consciousness, memory relapse, and submission to the occupants. In a less optimistic scenario, you may have engine trouble upon approaching the scene, and radio contact could be lost with your dispatcher."

CONCLUSION

"Some fire chiefs have little confidence in disaster plans, especially those dealing with UFOs or enemy attack. If you develop a plan that sets forth your responsibilities, resources, organizations, supplies information, telephone numbers, and special data that will be useful in obtaining help and fulfilling your role in disaster control, commit it to an electronic medium, a computer with a capability for continuous updating through modern word processing. Bring it forth when the need requires. With a good plan, good leadership, and adequate resources, you may save many lives in any disaster, including attack from possible enemies."

1 comment:

God Of Bacon said...

I'm sure the aliens have abandoned their plans for world domination and colonization now that they know FEMA is on guard.