Away on vacation

Light blogging period.

The King of Pop (August 29, 1958 - June 25, 2009)

Monkey takes a leak on President of Zambia

Is this what is meant by a press leak?

Farrah Fawcett is no longer with us

Farrah Fawcett was a pop culture figure whose hairstyle was emulated by millions of young women and whose poster sales broke records (about 5 million sold), making her an international sex symbol in the 1970s and 1980s. Just about every young male had the above poster hanging in his room. The nipple which can be seen through the fabric is standard stuff today but it sure wasn't back then.

She turned to more serious roles in the 1980s and 1990s, winning accolades for playing an abused wife in The Burning Bed.

Oh My! Carly Simon is 64

Blue Jays MVP has got to be Marco Scutaro

I thought last season Marco Scutaro was the Jays best player though most people thought I was nuts. He's just a career utility player with a decent glove and a so-so bat. Well he hit .267 which isn't going to get anyone excited but he was consistent throughout the season. And he played everywhere in the infield and played each position well. First he filled in for Rolen at third when he was hurt. Then he went on to fill in for Hill when he went down. The guy has bounced around for a while was twice a waiver pick up (Mets and Oakland). Give Riccardi some credit here. He dealt away Graham Godfrey and Kristian Bell to nab Marco.

This year he has become the prototype leadoff hitter. He gets on base and finds away to get home. Now it doesn't hurt to be hitting in front of Aaron Hill. But Scutaro leads the AL in runs scored, is 2nd in walks and 7th in hits. And he provides the Jays with stellar defense. Check out his stats, he is doing as well as Jeters and is only paid $1 million. Oh and did I mention he only has one error (a bad call in fact). His fielding percentage is an incredible .997.

There is talk that he might get invited to the All-Star game. He certainly is deserving. The Blue Jays have 40 wins already this season and are sitting in the wild car spot largely because of the hitting coming out of Scutaro, Hill and Lind. Hill and Lind were supposed to produce like this. Marco is a real pleasant surprise.

Old Jews telling jokes

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Jarret Stoll gets cold feet 7 weeks before his wedding

L.A. King Jarett Stoll has cancelled his wedding with actress Rachel Hunter just weeks before the date. Supposedly guests were emailed by Stoll informing them of the "non-event". Rod Stewart's ex-wife, 39, has been left confused and heartbroken after Jarret failed to give her a reason behind the cancellation.

Jarret proposed to Rachel last August after two years of dating. This Rachel's second hockey relationship. She had previously dated Sean Avery. Yes, it seems everyone has previously dated Sean but it seems no one is ever currently dating him.

LCBO strike averted after stocks are depleted

People immediately begin hording every time there is a threat of supplies being disrupted. It doesn't matter if its gas, bread, post its or booze. So as soon as word spread that the LCBO may be shut down by a strike, the lineups sprang up. People bought anything and shelves emptied in just 48 hours. Despite the fact that the LCBO have always settled and never had a strike.

I hope this BK ad isn't directed at kids

They have to be desperate at Burger King if they are using sex to sell their crappy burgers.

Japanese baseball fans makes a great catch

This must be an Al Qaeda terrorist training technique

If you were Brian Burke, what free agents would you sign?

As important as the draft may be to a team's future, the free agent market is critical if teams are to make a move in the standings. But there are likely more bad signing than good ones. I don't think I need to explain that to any Leaf fan. So who should Brian Burke sign considering the top players are looking at sometimes 7 year contracts or longer.

So here is a hypothetical situation. Let's say Brian Burke trades both Kaberle and Kubina. That means he has a payroll of about $33 million including Darcy Tucker's buyout. So if he decides to cap his payroll at $53 million that gives him $20 million to spend on 4 forwards, 2 defensemen and 1 goalie (no Jonas Gustavsson signed). This is all hypothetical and assumes no younger players make the squad (Tyler Bozak, Jiri Tlusty, Dale Mitchell, Viktor Stalberg). Here are his choices with current salaries and what he would likely cost to sign this summer.

Sedin Twins - $7.5 million ($11 million)
Marion Gaborik - $7.5 million ($7.5 million)
Mats Sundin - $7 million ($5 million)
Jay Bouwmeester - $5 million ($ 7 million)
Matthias Ohlund - $3.5 million ($5 million)
Mike Cammalleri - $3.6 million ($5.5 million)
Nik Antropov - $2.1 million (2.6 million)
Martin Havlat - $6 million ($ 6.5 million)
Maxim Afinogenov - $3.5 million ($2.5 million)
Jason Williams - $2.2 million ($3 million)
Todd Bertuzzi - $1.9 million ($1.5 million)
Chris Neil - $1.2 million ($1.8 million)
Dominic Moore - $0.9 million ($1.5 million)
Hal Gill - $2.2 million ($2 million)
Paul Mara - $2 million ($2 million)
Francois Beauchemin - $1.6 million ($2.4 million)
Dennis Seidenberg - $1.2 million ($2 million)
Martin Gerber - $3.7 million ($1.5 million)
Manny Fernandez - $4.75 million ($2 million)
Scott Clemmensen - $0.5 million ($1.2 million)
Manny Legace - $2.5 million ($1.2 million)

Now remember you only have $20 million to spend. Leave your picks in the comments section.

Hump Day Hottie

Olivia Munn

City dress code includes wearing underwear

If you want to work for the city of Brooksville, florida be sure that you use deodorant, that your clothes fit properly and that you cover up your wounds and tattoos.

And, for goodness sake, wear underwear.

I would love the job of inspecting staff to determine if they are wearing underwear. But only women please.

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This basketball trick shot has gone viral

Statue of the Week

Because, I'm heading off to Philadelphia at the end of the week.

Fashion Disaster

I dunno, Rhianna looks like a dominatrix to me.

Latest news from Iran

First it was the West Bank and now Israel must give back hummus

Lebanon plans to charge Israel with violating a food copyright by marketing provisions such as hummus and falafel as Israeli, Fadi Abboud, the president of the Lebanese Industrialists Association announced Monday. Abboud contends that these foods are historically Lebanese, and that Israel's appropriation of them has cost the Levantine country profits "estimated at tens of millions of dollars annually."

Lebanon's case will likely rely on "the feta precedent," said Abboud. Six years ago, Greece was able to win a monopoly on the production of feta cheese from the European Parliament by proving that the cheese and had been produced in Greece under that name for several millennia.

The origins of hummus remain shrouded in mystery, but attempts to claim the food as a "national dish" remain a reliable way to start nationalistic squabbles across the region. Bringing this case to the courts, however, is unlikely to win the Lebanese government points even with a domestic audience. Most likely, it will simply reinforce the belief that while Hezbollah readies its rockets against Israel, all the Lebanese state can muster is frivolous lawsuits.

Okay maybe they own hummus but the Jews own bagels and we want them back. No more cinnamon and raison bagels, multigrain bagels, sun dried tomato bagels, blueberry bagels, jalapeno chedder bagels, or chocolate chip bagels. They've screwed up bagels and I'm just sick about it!

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Tim Burton is filming Alice in Wonderland

Tim Burton does such wonderful things with fantasy films so his version of Alice in Wonderland should be special. It's another collaboration between Burton and Johnny Depp. In theatres in March 2010.

Johnny Depp as The Mad Hatter.

Helena Bonham Carter as The Red Queen.

Anne Hathaway as The White Queen.

Matt Lucas as Tweedledum and Tweedledee.

It also stars Mia Wasikowska (Alice) pictured below, Michael Sheen (The White Rabbit), Alan Rickman (The Caterpiller), Christopher Lee (The Jabberwock), Crispin Glover (The Knave of Hearts) and Stephen Fry (The Cheshire Cat).

Scott Pilgrim vs. The World filming in Toronto

Any photos coming out from the shoot have the actors with their faces concealed. Coming out in the Summer of 2010.

Michael Cera as Scott Pilgrim

Anna Kendick as Stacey Pilgrim

Mary Elizabeth Winstead as Romona Flowers

Mae Whitman as Roxy Richter


Ellen Wong as Knives Chau

Is Sacha Baron Cohen over promoting Bruno?

This man has no shame.

Yankees vs. Marlins Fathers Day rumble

Yes boys will be boys and why not lose it at a ball game in front of your kids. In case you were wondering the Marlins won 6-5.

Perez Hilton claims he was assaulted in Toronto

Celebrity reporter and drama queen Perez Hilton claims to have been assaulted by Black Eyed Peas member Will.I.Am last night in Toronto. Rather than calling the police, he sent out a plea for police help on Twitter, which suggests to me that he's either full of shit or he's totally stupid. Publicity stunts work though. I don't know about Hollywood but in Toronto the police do not monitor Twitter.

If interested here are his tweets:

• PerezHilton: I'm in shock. I need the police ASAP. Please come to the SoHo Metropolitan Hotel now. Please.

• PerezHilton: I was assaulted by Will.I.Am of the Black Eyed Peas and his security guards. I am bleeding. Please, I need to file a police report. No joke.

• PerezHilton: Still waiting for the police. The bleeding has stopped. I need to document this. Please, can the police come to the SoHo Met Hotel.

Toronto garbage strike means time to go on vacation

Torontonians are bracing themselves for a stinking hot summer strike after talks with the city ended at a standstill and thousands of city workers walked off the job late last night.

The city got a taste of summer heat yesterday, and it's expected to continue throughout the week, with temperatures and humidity that would make impending piles of uncollected garbage all the more noxious.

Closed public pools and lack of ferry service for non-island residents will leave Torontonians with fewer options when it comes to cooling off. But shuttered city daycares are forcing parents of more than 2,000 children to rethink childcare plans.

Well if you think you can drink your sorrows away...maybe not. If the LCBO and its workers cannot reach an agreement by 12:01 a. m. on Wednesday, roughly 7,200 unionized employees will go on strike. The city will really get dry.

Lose some weight before getting into a Lamborghini

The battle to sign Jonas Gustavsson

It appears to be a 4-way battle to sign free agent Swedish goaltender Jonas Gustavsson between Toronto, Colorado, San Jose and Dallas. Gustavsson just completed a tour of the 4 NHL cities and some people are saying the Leafs have the leading contenders (mostly Toronto media I suspect). Every team has had the big guns out trying to win him over. The collective agreement caps entry level salaries so money will not be the deciding factors. His representatives have indicated that he does not expect to be a starting goalie and realizes it would be better not be a starter right away. But he would like lots of playing opportunity. Here is what Gustavsson has been looking at:



Dallas Stars

Fabian Brunnstrom is a good friend of Gustavsson's has been talking to him. Les Jackson was the man who won the recruiting battle to sign Brunnstrom and has directed the Stars' recruiting effort with Gustavsson. Also a big player has been Stars goaltending consultant Andy Moog, who visited Gustavsson in Sweden with Stars scout Johan Garpenlov. Everyone is getting the Swedes out to meet with Gustavsson. He even met with former President George W. Bush. The Stars have not been happy with their backup goaltending which means too much work for starter Marty Turko. Dallas would like to have a backup play 20-25 games. Turko who is 33 will be a UFA at the end of the season is using up $5.7 million of salary cap space.

Colorado Avalanche

It has been confirmed that Peter Forsberg has talked to the goalie and so have other players though Avs management isn't saying who. He also met with new coach Joe Sacco, and team management. The Avs have no goalie at the moment having decided not to bring back Peter Budaj or Andrew Raycroft. Colorado acknowledges they are not the front runners and are the only ones able to offer a starting job right away. It is well known that this franchise is currently a mess.

San Jose Sharks

Starting goalie Evgeni Nabokov is also 33 and on the final year of his contract with a cap hit of $5.375 million. Backup Brian Boucher is a free agent. There’s a connection between the Sharks and Joe Resnick, the agent who represents Jonas Gustavsson. Resnick and John Thornton, brother of center Joe Thornton, are the two co-founders of Top Shelf Sports Management. Who knows if that means anything here.

Toronto Maple Leafs

The Maple Leafs have gone all out in the hunt of "The Monster" as Gustavsson is referred to. Brian Burke has already met with him several times. The Leafs had fellow Swede Jonas Frogren talk up the team with Gustavsson. Leaf legend Borje Salming had a word with him. But the Leafs feel their ace in the hole is goalie guru Francois Allaire who has already had the opportunity to work briefly with Gustavsson.

The wonderful Meryl Streep is 60

CHUM sign returns

When the CHUM radio building on Yonge Street was sold last summer to a condo developer, CTVglobemedia assured worried heritage enthusiasts that the CHUM sign would be moved to the future home of its stations. The sign was taken down in September and erected this week at its new home, where it has been broken down to fit the contour of the building.

Originally erected in 1959, the sign received its first restoration in the late 1970s. It suffered significant damage when the station's tower was sabotaged in August 1986. Two nearby residents who believed that the tower interfered with their television reception decided, after a healthy drinking session, to crawl onto the station's roof with a pair of bolt cutters. The perpetrators, later convicted for "mischief endangering the lives of others," were not prepared for how quickly the tower toppled onto Yonge Street, crushing the "CH" portion of the sign. Stories vary as to whether the sign was repaired or replaced with a replica after this incident.

Is the Calvin Klein billboard offensive?

Calvin Klein are at it again. Some New Yorkers are reportedly up in arms over the latest Calvin Klein billboard that the Daily News says "seems to show a teenage girl in a threesome—with suggestions of a foursome." So what do you think?

Bare back bikers in London

On Saturday the London chapter of the World Naked Bike Ride hit the road. The organizers reckon you won't hurt your genitals riding nude if you've got the right saddle but did recommend wearing sunscreen, footwear and a helmet - safety first.

Canada Geese being killed near NYC airports

Just a few blocks north of Union Square, a crowd gathered outside the headquarters of the Port Authority of New York and New Jersey on Tuesday afternoon to protest New York City’s plan to kill at least 2,000 geese during their molting season, a time when the geese cannot fly. The protesters accused the mayor’s office of planning the action in secret, in conjunction with the federal Agriculture Department and the Port Authority.

The Port Authority brushed off the protest, insisting that the culling was necessary to prevent bird strikes — and adding a rhyme for good measure. “Our responsibility is to think about safety for people before peace for geese,” a Port Authority spokesman, Stephen Sigmund, said.

The authorities announced the plan to kill the geese on Thursday, in response to the bird strike that resulted in the nearly disastrous ditching of US Airways Flight 1549 in the Hudson River in January. The first 100 geese were killed on Monday.

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Go Leafs Go!

I didn't know Lady Ga Ga was a Maple Leaf fan.

Mug Shot of the Week

First day of summer

...so its time to ride with the top down.