Saturday, March 26, 2011

Revenge for Helena Guergis?

They are off and running for the May 2 election and the most fascinating riding would have to be Simcoe-Grey where Helena Guergis was booted out of the Conservative caucus because of serious allegations. Which turned out to be no more than Stephen Harper being fed up with her and husband Rahim Jaffer.

Guergis is prepared to run as an Independent which has created turmoil in the Conservative riding association. The Conservative nomination meeting hasn't been held but the preferred candidate is Dr. Kellie Leitch who comes with strong credentials. This has lead to some Guergis loyalist resigning from the riding association.

Simcoe – Grey is an otherwise Conservative stronghold in Ontario. The riding has voted in Progressive Conservatives at the provincial level for most of its history, and only a split in the vote allowed the federal Liberals to hold the riding before 2004. The Guergis family is very well-known in the region, but a few of the outcast Tory’s cousins were recently defeated in municipal elections amid some controversy. Helena Guergis has strong conservative views so having two conservative candidates could be a bonus for the Liberals much like in the elections before the merger of the Progressive Conservatives and the Canadian Alliance.

This is how the polling looked prior to the election being called:

Conservatives 35%
Liberals 24%
Helena Guergis 21%
Green 11%
New Democrats 10%

There is a lot of sympathy in the riding over the way Harper treated Guergis. It should be interesting.

Hacker puts porn on Moscow electronic billboard

A hacker who placed pornography on a video billboard above Moscow's inner ring road has been jailed for one and a half years. Igor Blinnikov, 40, uploaded the video on 14 January last year from his home computer in Novorossiysk, a city 1,225km (760 miles) south of Moscow. The shipyard fitter confessed to the offence, describing it as a "bad joke".

Speaking to journalists before his sentence, Blinnikov said he had hacked into the billboard "just for something to do" and, when asked how he had managed to do it, replied: "It would take too long to explain." The video had created a traffic jam on the ring road.

Divorce papers used to burn down ex-wife's salon

A Lolo man accused of torching his estranged wife's beauty salon told Missoula County sheriff's detectives that he used his divorce papers to help start the fire. Shawn Robyn Gawronski, 33, was sitting in his truck, gun in hand, near the burning Gifted Hands salon in Frenchtown when sheriff's deputies arrived early on Monday morning, according to the affidavit filed by Missoula Deputy County Attorney Patricia Bower.

"The court finds you to be a threat to both the victim and the community," Missoula County Justice of the Peace Karen Orzech said on Tuesday, in setting Gawronski's bail at $200,000, double the amount Bower requested.

Gawronski told law enforcement officers that he'd also slashed the tires on vehicles belonging to his mother- and sister-in-law and her boyfriend. And Bower pointed out that Gawronski allegedly violated a protection order.

"He was not supposed to go to the place of business and he certainly was not supposed to light it on fire," Bower said. Gawronski is charged with arson, a felony that carries a maximum penalty of 20 years in prison and/or a $50,000 fine, as well as misdemeanor counts of criminal mischief and violating a protection order.

You think Shawn is a little bitter? Maybe he should have stopped with the tire slashing. Well he will have lots of time for counselling over the next 10 to 20 years. I'm sure he'll get over the divorce by the time he hits the street again in around 2025.

$300 million election we don't want Week

Seems that 'Fat Ho Burgers' is not politically correct

Fat Ho Burgers might seem to some like an unusual name for a restaurant, but its owner has defended her choice after coming under fire from local businesses in Waco, Texas. Lakita Evans is the mastermind behind the burger joint and its unconventional name, and said she had no intention of causing offence.

'It's not calling people a ho. It's just like they say, "Oooh that ho is big," or, "That ho is tight!"' she said. Other local business owners don't see it that way and the 23-year-old entrepreneur has come under criticism from the nearby Gospel Cafe, an eatery and bookshop run by religious volunteers.

Pastor Marsha Martie said: 'Would've been nice to think a little more sensitively.' However, Ms Evans has defended the Fat Ho Cafe, which counts Sloppy Ho Brisket and Supa Dupa Fly Ho with Chz among its specials. And for the younger Fat Ho customers, there's Tiny Ho Meals.

Luckily for Evans, the publicity surrounding her controversial burger joint has reportedly been great for business. This week they ran out of change and then beef.

Friday, March 25, 2011

How Lindsay Lohan plans to stay out of jail

It appears that Lindsay Lohan (who no longer plans to use her last name) want her day in courts. You remember she was caught lifting a $2,500 necklace from a Malibu shop.

Even though many people felt Lindsay Lohan should have taken the plea deal in her felony theft case she wants her day in court. That's because the first thing the new judge will do is have a hearing to determine if there’s enough evidence to go to trail. If she concludes that there is, then Lindsay Lohan will automatically be found guilty of violating her probation.

That would not be good.

So what's the plan Lindsay Lohan ?

Well, Lindsay’s attorney will ask that Lindsay not be remanded into custody. That's it. Really why would any judge turn them down? Can't wait to see how this one ends.

I want this dog!

$300 million election we don't want Week

Thursday, March 24, 2011

Fred Karger is running for President

Longtime political activist and campaign consultant Fred Karger will become the first to officially file with the Federal Election Commission to run for the Republican nomination for president in 2012.

Karger was the first to announce his intent to run in April 2010 and the first to form an exploratory committee in July 2010. He has traveled to Iowa and New Hampshire multiple times and even launched a commercial for a brief time.

Karger’s resume includes working as a senior consultant for Presidents Ronald Reagan, George H. W. Bush and Gerald Ford.

Oh by the way, Fred's gay.

Not that there is anything wrong with that.

Global Toronto reporter speaks gibberish on-air

Global Toronto reporter Mark McAllister suffered an on-air medical issue that left him with badly garbled speech. He turned out to be fine. What is actually funny is how anchor Anne Mroczkowski acts as if he made perfect sense.

School calls in counsellors after student see hockey fight

For the average hockey fan, fights can be an acceptable, even anticipated, part of an aggressive, physical game.

For some parents of the thousands of children at the Portland Pirates' annual School Day game Tuesday, a fight that ended with the ejection of four players was too much.

"We were horrified by what we witnessed," said Catherine Anderson, who attended the game with her 6-year-old son's kindergarten class from Reiche School in Portland. "(My son) said, 'Mommy, what's happening?' and I said, 'These men are acting out of control and they're making bad choices.' And he said, 'Why isn't it stopped?' "

Observers at the game said the reaction at the Cumberland County Civic Center to the fights was mixed, with some students -- particularly older ones -- apparently not fazed by the action. But some children and parents were upset, so much so that Anderson said Reiche's interim principal, Paul Yarnevich, promised her in an email that teachers would talk to their students Wednesday about the "inappropriateness" of the fighting and make the school counselor available to any who were upset.

Susan Allen, a hockey fan and teacher at Eight Corners Elementary in Scarborough who accompanied about 40 first- and second-graders to the game, said she made the fight "a teachable moment."

"I told them, 'Hockey players are much like first-graders sometimes -- they have disagreements and they have consequences for what they do,' " Allen said. "When the referee thought they could make better choices, they were allowed back into the game."

Risa Johnson, who is raising her grandson and sends him to Portland's East End Community School, said she was "outraged" by the fighting.

Johnson said she used to work at the civic center during hockey games and originally decided that her grandson, a fifth-grader, would not go on the field trip.

But his teacher called to encourage her to send him to the game and said the school had been "guaranteed" a non-violent game by the Pirates, so she relented.

Today's educators make me crazy. I'm not sure which is worse taking little kids to watch a hockey game or freaking out because you think you've scarred them for life. It's not like they had to watch their dad getting murdered or watching their mother give birth to their sister.


$300 million election we don't want Week

Naked woman rescued from 450-foot cliff

San Diego’s Black’s Beach is known for being a haven for nude sunbathers in the area. But lifeguards had a rare situation on their hands when they saw a woman trapped atop a 450-foot high cliff.

State Rangers said that the woman was stranded on the cliff in the middle of the afternoon when a report trickled in from a man who saw the poor gal’s precarious situation.

According to one of the Rangers on the scene, the 27-year-old woman had arrived at a part of the cliff where it was impossible to go up, down, or sideways without certain problems.

The woman was retrieved with a harness and brought to safety, only to go back up to get her clothes and be brought down again.

She was cited by Rangers upon her rescue, but not for the nudity — the woman had entered a restricted area and using a path not intended for visitors’ use.

I’m sure that cliff rescues are never exactly fun due to all of the danger involved, but if you’re going to rescue someone off a cliff, a tan 27-year-old naked girl is probably the best the situation can get. Either way, glad she made it home safely. We need more girls with more nudity and less common sense out there.


Wednesday, March 23, 2011

Mom gives 8 year old botox and virgin waxes

Meet Britney. According to The Sun, her mother likes to stick needles loaded with botulism into her face:

Once every three months, Britney climbs on a beautician's table and watches as mum Kerry prepares needles of Botox and fillers to be injected into her face.

Beautician Kerry, 34, from Birmingham, buys the substances online and injects them into her daughter's forehead, lips and around her eyes.

She says: "What I am doing for Britney now will help her become a star."

Kerry strives to prevent secondary signs of sexual maturation in her daughter.

She also has her virgin wax monthly, which gets rid of her fluffy leg hair and makes sure she wont develop pubic hair in the future.

Some signs of sexual maturation, however, are to be desired:

Britney says: "My friends think it's cool I have all the treatments and they want to be like me. I check every night for wrinkles, when I see some I want more injections.

"They used to hurt, but now I don't cry that much.

"I also want a boob and nose job soon, so that I can be a star."


Elizabeth Taylor: 1932-2011

"You're Norma Desmond. You used to be in silent pictures. You used to be big."
"I am big. It's the pictures that got small."

Billy Wilder described it best in Sunset Boulevard. Liz Taylor was one of those big stars that dominated the screen. There wasn't a bigger star and bigger celebrity in her day.

Taylor at 18 in the film A Place In The Sun

Now that 'Friday' girl was on Leno

Where did the day go?

$300 million election we don't want Week

Hump Day Hottie

Bar Refaeli aka בר רפאלי

Tuesday, March 22, 2011

Rebecca Black is laughing all the way to the bank

It appears Rebecca Black has a hit song. The 13-year-old singer’s video for her song “Friday,” has gone viral on the Internet with 30 million hits. Sure it's mediocrity but what so good about Britney Spears or Katy Perry? Black's video has become the laughingstock of millions, who have latched on to its simplistic lyrics and amateurish production. But she may laughing all the way to the bank.

The “Friday” video — which was uploaded to YouTube on February 10th — didn’t get much traction until early last week, when it suddenly caught a web tailwind. Black’s name trended on twitter and the video spiraled to go viral.

For videos running ads on YouTube there is a revenue sharing program which is about $1 per 1000 views. That revenue is then split between YouTube and the content creator. Content creators, or partners, take 68% of the profit. At 30,000,000 views, that lands Black and Ark Music Factory $20,000 – a 1000% return on investment made by Black's mother.

Wait that's not all. The song is available for download on Apple's iTune which pays out $.70 per single download in the United States. The song is reported to have been downloaded 200,000 so far which comes out to $140,000 in revenue. The song is also for sale on,,, and other online retailers. So the money will keep rolling in.

Not bad for a 13 year old.

Happy 80th birthday to William Shatner

1957: The Alfred Hitchcock Hour

1963: The Twilight Zone

1966-1969: Star Trek The Original Series

1982-86: TJ Hooker

2004-08: The Practice / Boston Legal

2010-11: $#*! My Dad Says

One Hit Wonder

SSG Barry Sadler - Ballad of the Green Berets (1966)

Pole dancin for Jesus

Don't spurn advances of batshit crazy old ladies

An elderly Florida woman is accused of shooting at her neighbor's house after the man refused to kiss her.

Helen Staudinger, 92, was arrested Monday evening by the Marion County Sheriff's department on charges of discharging a gun at a home.

Staudinger had been at the home of her neighbor, 53-year-old Dwight Bettner. Bettner told police that Staudinger believes the two are in a romantic relationship and when she asked for a kiss, Bettner ordered her to "get the [expletive] out of my house."

She left and returned home, but the police report says she brandished a handgun from her property and fired at Bettner's carport.

Four bullets struck the house, one of them missing Bettner by "mere inches."

Bettner told police that despite the fact that he has a girlfriend, Staudinger believes he is "supposed to be her man."

He was not hurt in the shooting.

I like Helen's attitude. If I get to be 92 I'm going act batshit crazy too. Walk around town smoking weed in my housecoat. What are they going to do throw me in jail?


Hallelujah Matt Cooke has seen the light!

“I realize and understand, more so now than ever, that I need to change,” Cooke told Pittsburgh reporters Monday night. “That’s what I wanted my message to be.” Matt Cooke

What a pile of bullshit neatly wrapped in paper with a bow.

Cooke is 32 years old and been in the NHL for 13 years and it took this long to figure out he was playing the game wrong? As he was walking into the NHL offices for his hearing he must have had an epiphany. Next he will give up swearing and drinking bear.

Players like Matt Cooke have understood their role very well. He can chip in for 10 to 15 goals per season and is good at killing penalties. But his real value to a team is as an agitator. His extended NHL career is directly related to his ability to injury and intimidate. The weak enforcement of rules allowed him to earn the reputation as the dirtiest player in the league. He relished the notoriety because it earned him a good income. His announcement that he plans to change his approach has nothing to do with a concern for the game or his opponents. He understands where in the past blindsiding players kept him employed; now he has to stop to ensure the pay cheques keep coming. Players have no respect for each other. They will do whatever it takes to play in the NHL. No NHL fighter enjoys taking bare knuckle punches to his face or skull but if that’s what his coach expects him to do then he will.

“I’m fortunate that Ryan McDonagh wasn’t hurt,” said Cooke. “I don’t want to hurt anybody. That’s not my intention. I know that I can be better. ... I made a mistake, and I’m the one who’s accountable for that. And I take full responsibility for it.” Matt Cooke

Matt Cooke never intended to hurt anyone? That’s what is really infuriating about players like Cooke. They would jeopardize an opponent’s career to promote their own. He may have ended Marc Savard’s career. What was he trying to do when he came across the ice to blindside him? Who is he trying kid?

Ironically Cooke had a role what was one of the most brutal attacks the NHL has ever seen. On March 8, 2007, Canuck coach Marc Crawford sent Matt Cooke out on the ice to take on Avalanche forward Steve Moore who had in a previous meeting injured Canuck star Markus Naslund. Moore held his own against Cooke that night but it didn't end there. An upset Crawford then instructed Todd Bertuzzi to teach Moore a lesson. The rest is history.

Intelligent fans understand the hitting is part of the game. Body checks are intended to separate a puck carrier from the puck and nothing more. That’s the way the game was played for decades. Of course injuries can result from contact but hits were never intended to take a person’s head off. But that is exactly the attitude that has crept into the game.

The reaction to the Cooke suspension has been positive. But if the worst offender in the league only gets 10 games and one round of playoffs then what happens the next time Dany Heatley targets someone head. Another slap on the wrist? Maybe. I’m not convinced that the NHL is ready to clean up their game rather than responding to external pressure. We shall see what the future brings.

Iran unveils flying saucer

The unmanned flying saucer, named "Zohal", was unveiled in a ceremony attended by Supreme Leader of the Islamic Revolution Ayatollah Seyed Ali Khamenei.

Zohal, designed and developed jointly by Farnas Aerospace Company and Iranian Aviation and Space Industries Association (IASIA), can be used for various missions, specially for aerial imaging.

The flying machine is equipped with an auto-pilot system, GPS (Global Positioning System) and two separate imaging systems with full HD 10 mega-pixel picture quality and is able to take and send images simultaneously.

Zohal uses a small, portable navigation and monitoring center for transmission of data and images and can fly in both outdoor and indoor spaces.

why does that photo look like a screenshot from a 1950 sci fi movie? Iran has the technology to build an unmanned flying saucer but all they can come up with is a fuzzy photo that looks like it was taken by an old Kodak Brownie. Those Iranians are so full of shit.

Worst wedding video ever

The bride and groom had doubts about about their choice of wedding cameraman when he turned up looking scruffy and disshevelled. But even his shambolic appearance did not prepare the couple for quite how bad his video of their big day would turn out.

Treasured moments like the signing of the register, the cutting of the cake and the newlyweds' first steps out the church were all missing. What film was taken was "wonky" and featured a lot of grass - because the camera had been left on the lawn for an important shot. The footage of the wedding mostly featured guests feet and backs, and many were taken too far away to make out faces.

He even managed to include people who were not at the wedding. The unprofessional nature of Clayton Bennett's recording work emerged after the couple won a court battle against him demanding their money back.

$300 million election we don't want Week

Monday, March 21, 2011

Rebecca Black parodies are getting churned out

...meanwhile her video has over 30 million hits in just a month.

Bride arrested at own wedding reception

Police officers Saturday night had to restrain and arrest a bride who became disorderly at her own wedding reception party.

About 9:30 p.m. Saturday, officers responded to an unknown trouble call at a home southeast of Phoenix, in Gilbert. They were told by attendees that people in the backyard were "killing each other" and officers observed a large brawl.

Officers commanded people to stop fighting but those orders went ignored. They had to spray the crowd with pepper spray, which allegedly made the swarm angry and aggressive towards police.

Officers called for backup, and several other officers were sent to the scene, along with Gilbert firefighters to attend to victims of pepper spray exposure.

Order was soon restored, but that was short-lived.

The bride, 28-year-old Angela Davito, charged another partygoer and had to be restrained, according to police.

She allegedly kicked an officer and was arrested.


Herceptin: When evidence-based medicine meets politics

The case of Jill Anzarut is an interesting one. She is a 35 year old breast cancer patient who did not qualify for cancer drug Herceptin because guidelines in Ontario stipulate that your tumour must be at least 1 cm to be provided with Herceptin which costs the province $40,000 per patient. The issue becomes more contentious because patients with small tumours can get Herceptin in B.C., Alberta and Saskatchewan, and on a case-by-case basis in some other provinces. So the Ontario government has to explain why there is unequal access to the drug across the country.

Ms. Anzarut waged a very public campaign to have her decision reversed. Health Minister Deb Matthews has been insisting that she did not have the authority to overrule to bureaucracy created by the Ministry of Health to distance the politicians from these decisions. Then today we learn that the Health Minister has announced a “new program” for cancer drugs.

Ms. Anzarut’s situation set off a debate on our health care system that the government wanted to avoid just 7 months before the next provincial election. The media description has also conflicting and contained some misinformation.

Over the years the Ministry of Health has been trying to make decisions based on medical and scientific studies, often referred to as evidence-based medicine. Some people consider this to be one of the evils of socialize medicine. However, this approach is both logical and credible whether it is a publicly funded system who private. It makes no sense to provide treatment where research says it is ineffective. Too often doctors provide drugs and treatment that they know is useless because they would prefer not to have to say no to their patients. So for decades patients have been prescribed antibiotics for viral infections when it was known by the medical profession that they shouldn’t be used. So the reason that the government creates these guidelines is that doctors do not follow evidence-based medicine even when they know what the science says. Another example is the treatment of soft-tissue injuries. Research shows that, in the majority of cases, soft tissue will heal without any treatment at all. Yet chiropractors and physiotherapists provide all types of treatment that is often useless. Treatment costs in the auto insurance system are out of control partly because health care providers ignore evidence-based medicine.

Getting back to Jill Anzarut, to justify denying her Herceptin the government has been suggesting to the public that the drug is not effective on smaller tumours. However, that’s not what the research suggests. In fact there is insufficient research on the impact of Herceptin on smaller tumours to make any conclusion. So in the absence of scientific evidence, the clinicians who developed the guidelines restricted Herceptin use to where the science was clear. This is likely why some provinces consider these requests on a case-by-case basis. One lesson to be learned is that although developing clinical guidelines based on sound research and medical evidence is a good thing, if you do not apply the evidence properly you can still run into problems.

This is good news for Jill Anzarut but I wonder if this would have ended up in her favour if there wasn’t a provincial election in October. I’m not being cynical. Governments are just more sensitive to these issues at the end of their mandates.

No vagina to hide contraband? Try your rectum!

Sentenced and jailed Tuesday on a narcotics conviction, a California man smuggled a Kyocera cell phone, an MP3 player, ear bud headphones, marijuana, tobacco, and $140 in cash into a county lockup by hiding the contraband in his rectum, investigators allege.

The items were recovered when Lake County corrections officers strip searched Earl Lee Vogt and tossed his cell. The searches Wednesday evening were prompted when a jailer detected the smell of marijuana in the 29-year-old tattoo artist’s cell.

When questioned by a sheriff’s deputy who thought he was feeling discomfort, Vogt denied being in pain, though he noted, “My ass is bleeding.”

Vogt claimed that he had obtained the marijuana from another inmate in exchange for a second MP3 player he had smuggled into the northern California lockup. Jail officials doubt this assertion.

This could be a real trend now. First ladies are using their vagina to carry contraband and now guys not wanting to be outdone by the ladies are using their rectum. This could catch on in Toronto where retailers are required to charge customers 5 cents for a plastic bag. "Would like to buy a bag to carry your purchases?" "No thanks, I'll carry them home in my rectum."


Man fires shots after Taco Bell price increase

A Taco Bell drive-through customer who became enraged because of a price increase on Beefy Crunch Burritos fired a BB gun through the window at a manager on Sunday, police said.

No one was hurt from the shots fired by the man, who also waved a pistol and an assault rifle in the parking lot, Police Sergeant Chris Benavides said.

As the restaurant's employees and customers hit the floor, the manager called police, and when officers arrived, the angry patron fired several shots at the police cars, Benavides said.

The man then barricaded himself inside a nearby motel room, sparking a standoff that lasted until until police lobbed tear gas inside and the man surrendered.

If you're going to make your last stand then it should be over a 99 cent burrito. Go down in a blaze of glory
with a gun in one hand and a Beefy Crunch Burrito in the other. How else are you going to make corporate America understand that we aren't going to be pushed around anymore. Except...umm try a real gun next time and not a BB gun.


$300 million election we don't want Week