When short-sighted pensioner Alf Spence tottered down to his local postbox to send a card, he hoped he hadn’t missed the last collection.
But as he popped the envelope through the little slot a concerned passerby looked at him with a stunned expression.
The Good Samaritan tapped befuddled Alf, 91, on the shoulder and explained to him that he wasn’t stood in front of a postbox but had in fact posted his great-grandson’s birthday card into a dog waste bin!
Partially-blind Alf is now facing up to the fact he’s been “posting” his letters, cards and competition entries into a box of steaming pooch turd for the past two years!
Alf has since contacted Royal Mail telling them to cancel their investigation into the hundreds of missing letters and parcels he’s sent over the last two years.
Yeah that story is pretty gross. I could tell you grosser stories about my elderly parents but I'll spare you.
Ms. Kolstad, a 83 year old widow who lives in Orange County, Calif., underwent a three-hour breast lift with implants on July 22, coming to a cost of about $8,000, reports The New York Times.
Reasoning why she underwent the procedure, at her age, she said, “your breasts go in one direction and your brain goes in another.”
“Physically, I’m in good health, and I just feel like, why not take advantage of it?” said Ms. Kolstad, who works full-time as a property manager.
“My mother lived a long time, and I’m just taking it for granted that that will happen to me. And I want my children to be proud of what I look like,” she said, The New York Times reports.
Owen Lemire Kato, 23, was being removed as a trespasser from the restaurant at 2404 Santa Barbara Blvd. South after standing near the north entrance for more than 10 minutes and attracting the ire of customers, who had complained someone was popping pimples on his back, according to a police report.
When an off-duty officer tried to get Kato to leave, he asked for the suspect’s name. Kato initially told him it was John Smith, but then gave his real name and date of birth. The cooperation ended there as the suspect allegedly decided to flee.
Another officer nearby noticed Kato run past his cruiser as he heard the call go out over the radio about the disturbance.
After a foot chase, Kato was tackled and taken into custody.
While searching him, officers reportedly found a syringe in his pocket, which Kato’s girlfriend said he used to inject “blues,” or Oxycontin.
Kato told police he offered a fake name and ran because he had an active warrant.
The Blue Jays having been cheating? That’s great news. It means that Rogers is finally committed to winning. Stealing signs in other forms of cheating are ingrained in baseball. Base runners have been known to try to pick up signs and communicate them to hitters. Catchers will come to the mound and cover their face with their glove for fear of having an opponent read their lips.
Baseball barely had codified rules before players started figuring out ways to bend them. The original Cincinnati Red Stockings during their undefeated 1869 season took advantage of the fact that the infield fly rule hadn’t been invented, turning double plays on deliberately dropped infield pop-ups with runners on base.
Cutting the bases and impeding base runners were among the favorite tricks of the Baltimore Orioles. There was only one umpire per game in the 1890s, and he couldn’t keep an eye on the runners, the fielders and the ball all at once. Hence, if the ump turned his back, a runner would say, bypass third base on his way from second to home. On the other side of the ball, the Orioles were notorious for giving opposing base runners the hip or grab the runner, making the journey around the bases somewhat perilous.
Faking catches, although still practiced, had its heyday in the pre-lighting era. Nowadays any outfielder who traps a ball, either on the ground or against the fence, will hold up his glove to “show” he’s caught it. In the old days, when games were often played in twilight, fielders would sometimes try to really put on a show including pretending to catch a ball that had gone over the fence for a home run.
Then there is the doctoring of the field. Milwaukee Brewers used to move the right field wall, depending on whether the Brewers or the opponents’ had more left-handed power. They at first pulled this little stunt between games, but then decided to do it between innings, in other words, the fence would be rolled out when the opposing team was at bat, and rolled back when the Brewers were up.
The most common, and most famous, means of cheating became just that after baseball banned trick deliveries and foreign substances on the ball after the 1920 season. So common, in fact, that there’s just no point in even trying to list all of the accused spitball, scuffball, greaseball and the like artists who have practiced their craft since that time. It’s worth noting that Gaylord Perry, Don Drysdale, Don Sutton, Dizzy Dean and Whitey Ford are all in the Hall of Fame and all were suspected cheaters. Joe Niekro was suspended in 1985 when an ump found a nail file in his pocket.
Prior to 1940, the rules just said a bat had to be made out of wood. Now, the rule says they have to be one piece of wood, a rule that Norm Cash, Billy Hatcher, Graig Nettles, Amos Otis, Albert Belle, Wilton Guerrero, and Sammy Sosa, among others, have ran afoul of, usually with either cork or superballs.
Finally, let’s get back to sign stealing, another vaguely illegal act that has been around forever. Now, having a coach or a manager who’s good at stealing signs on the field is OK. But, if you use technology and do it off the field, that’s not considered kosher, at least by the aggrieved parties. So the Blue Jays are alleged to be stealing signs from the outfield bleachers using a man in white who would signal when a breaking pitch was being thrown. Anonymous opposition players claim to have seen his routine. Of course the man in white wasn’t reported to have been using binoculars which mean he had amazing vision. Those seats have to be at least 450 feet from home plate. So maybe their was someone else feeding him the signs. Still it would be difficult for a hitter standing in the box to focus on some guy 450 feet away as he readies himself for the next 93 mph fastball coming his way. I like the creativeness and diligence of bloggers who searched the Internet for photos of fans in white sitting in the centre field bleachers at the Rogers Centre.
Baseball history has shown that an act isn’t cheating unless there is an actual rule against it. And then you have to get caught. Wonder if the man in white will ever be found?
A woman died after she fell head-first into her city-issued recycling container outside of her home, likely after going to throw trash away.
According to a preliminary report, Sheila Decoster, died of positional asphyxia, meaning that, because of Mrs. Decoster's position in the container, she was not able to breathe properly.
Mrs. Decoster was found Friday evening by her husband of 43 years, Richard. Mr. Decoster, who left for work about 3:30 a.m., returned home about 5 p.m. with a load of groceries. He didn't see his wife when he first walked in. He assumed she might be next door visiting with a neighbor, and when he walked out the front door, he saw his wife's leg sticking out of the bin, which is next to the porch.
The couple put the two receptacles against the porch, with the wheels toward the curb, to make taking out the trash easier on Mrs. Decoster, who had back problems and, about eight months ago, had knee-replacement surgery. Mrs. Decoster likely went outside to throw away a small bag of trash and, when she went to lift the lid, fell inside. Mr. Decoster said his wife had several medical issues that could have contributed, including dizzy spells and an aneurism on her brain.
August 9, 1988, is a day that lives in infamy for fans of both the Edmonton Oilers and Canadian hockey. Wayne Gretzky wasn't the only one shedding tears as he said goodbye at a press conference announcing his trade to the Los Angeles Kings. Fans wept, members of Parliament raged and the media soaked it all in.
It became known simply as The Trade.
At the end of the 1987-88 season, there was no reason to believe that Edmonton’s own version of Camelot would soon end. Gretzky had just raised the Stanley Cup over his head to conclude another banner season. The Oilers won their fourth Cup in five seasons, and Gretzky had wowed the League with a 149-point campaign despite missing 16 regular-season games to injury.
Shortly after 12:30 p.m., police were notified of a woman driving erratically, bashing into cars downtown.
One eyewitness said it looked like the woman was purposely driving into other vehicles.
“When people get into a car accident, it looks like an accident,” said Irena Karshenbaum. “This looked deliberate.
“When you see little kids driving go-karts slamming into each other, that’s what she was doing.”
Karshenbaum said she saw the driver hit two cars on Heritage Drive and Macleod Trail before speeding away southbound on Macleod without stopping.
“It was the craziest bit of driving I have ever seen in my life,” she said.
Although the tally is still being compiled, Acting Staff Sgt. Ronda Ruzycki said the driver hit 12 vehicles while also damaging trees and poles.
The chase went on for about an hour until police were finally able to box in the driver using four police cars on Canyon Meadows Drive S.W.
Ruzycki praised the work between the officers on the ground and the police chopper in the sky in co-ordinating the takedown.
“She travelled a great distance, but with all the units involved, she was taken down pretty quickly,” she said. “This could have been a much more serious incident if the units didn’t work so swiftly together.”
Once the driver was stopped, she remained in the car for some time while threatening officers with a knife, before finally being arrested.
She was taken to the hospital for observation. Alcohol is believed to be a factor.
It’s a monkey miracle — Bongo has been found!
An Upper East Side couple grieving over the loss of a stuffed toy monkey they’ve raised like a son the past decade went bananas with joy Saturday night after being reunited with their beloved Beanie Baby.
"I never gave up hope — I prayed, mediated, and now he’s with us again," said Bonni Marcus, 47, who along with boyfriend Jack Zinzi, 58, were devastated after losing Bongo on their way to a restaurant in Park Slope, Brooklyn, on August 1.
The 8-inch-tall doll was found Tuesday by Luis Barreto, 61, an unemployed Park Slope man, who discovered it atop a parking meter.
Bongo was only reunited with his "parents" after they returned to Flatbush Avenue by Sterling Place on Saturday to hang more fliers pleading for its return, and Zinzi approached Barreto and some other men hanging out on the street and told them about Bongo and the reward.
A 30-year-old man who slept nude on a boat dock suffered second-degree burns on 40 percent of his body and was taken to the hospital by helicopter, according to Austin-Travis County EMS spokesman Warren Hassinger.
The man jumped in Lake Travis, near Mc Cormick Mountain Drive in Hudson Bend, and refused to come out of the water, Hassinger said. When the man later came out near Mile Marker 5, authorities saw the second-degree burns, which are open blisters, Hassinger said.
STAR Flight transported the man to University Medical Center Brackenridge, Hassinger said.
You just don't sleep in the sun cause there is no pain worse than a sunburn. I'd rather go through child birth than experience a bad sunburn. You can't walk, sit, sleep, or have sex. Really limits your lifestyle. If you are going to doze off then I'm wearing at least SPF 80 maybe more.
When he took to the field at Camden Yards, Lawrie became the 17th Canadian to suit up for the Toronto Blue Jays in 35 seasons of big league play.
The best of the 17 to date has been Paul Quantrill, who pitched well in relief for six years in Toronto. Outfielder Rob Ducey started for a short time, kicking around the Jays. Dave McKay played a lot, although not necessarily well, in the Jays first two seasons of existence. But mostly it’s been cup of coffee players such as the Butler brothers, Rob and Rich, or relievers like Vince Horsman or Denis Boucher, or part of two seasons from the now-retired but always fun to watch, Matt Stairs.
A century ago yesterday, one of the funniest people who ever lived was born. Most of us grew up watching I Love Lucy even though the series ended before many fans were even born. The humour is timeless and entertains even though we have every episode by memory.
