Saturday, November 10, 2012

Nazem Kadri and Joe Colborne off to slow starts

The idea of using the AHL to get a jump on landing a roster spot on the Maple Leafs does not seem to be going very well for Leafs' biggest prospects Nazem Kadri and Joe Colborne.  After 10 games both have yet to score a goal.

Now on the positive side, Estonian pest Leo Komarov has 4 goals, tied for the team lead, and leads the team with a +4.  Seems he surely has a leg up on Kadri and Colborne at this point.  In fact both prospects have been benched this season.

Ben Scrivens has played the bulk of games for the Marlies but has not been their best goalie. He has a GAA of 2.82 and a SAV% of .894.  This does not sound like a guy who is going to be pushing James Reimer for the starting position.  Meanwhile Jussi Rynnas has just played 3 games but has 2 shutouts.  His GAA is 0.98 and his SAV% is .968.  No question the Leafs are going to need goaltending help - so we better hope the rumours about Luongo coming to Toronto are true.

UPDATE:  What do you know, both Kadri and Colborne scored their first goals of the season last night.   But Komarov also scored and now has the team lead (5).

Donald Fehr will squeeze the owners till the give in

I think everyone knew this CBA negotiation would be different with Donald Fehr at the table but no one was sure how.  Now it is slowly becoming apparent.

His approach can be best described as:

- frustrating the NHL negotiators
- being pessimistic about every NHL offer
- leaving people with the impression that he doesn't care about the game.

It is being reported that Fehr shows up late for most meetings.  We aren't talking about 30 minutes late but hours and hours late with no explanation. He tables very little in the way of material for the owners to review. He frustrates them at every turn which is why the NHL has begun to accuse him of misrepresenting their latest offer.  It appears as if they are hoping for a players revolt.  Not likely to happen this time.  They may be stuck dealing with him.

I think everyone knew the league would arrive at a 50% split which is where the NFL and NBA ended up.  But Fehr's insistence on honouring existing contracts has made things difficult for the owners.  The league has stopped pissing all over the union's position but that's not the case with Fehr.  As each day goes by the league is losing revenue that can't be recovered while the two sides bargain over small change.

Donald Fehr took over running the NHLPA specifically to negotiate the next contract.  I don't believe anyone thinks he will stay on after it's been completed.  So the fact that he has so little at stake in the process worries the owners.  If all he cares about is winning then why would he care about collateral damage? 

So right now Fehr is being subject to a little bit of character assassination by the NHL.  He really won't care.  In the meantime wealthy teams, sponsors and broadcasters want to move on.  Look for the league to give in soon.

Video of the week

This week's winner is a video of a woman who drive on the sidewalk to pass a stopped school bus.  An Ohio judge ordered the woman caught on video to wear a sign proclaming that she is an “idiot.”

A bus driver had noticed Hardin’s pattern along a Cleveland street so he notified the school district and had his cell phone camera rolling during one of her episodes. 

Please remember it's National Hoarders week

Friday, November 09, 2012

Blonde and drunk are a deadly combination

An apparently inebriated 22-year-old woman was rescued early Friday morning after she became wedged between two buildings.

Courtney A. Malloy, of Cheshire, Conn., was taken to Rhode Island Hospital after the hour-and-a-half rescue.

It appeared that Malloy tried using the narrow alley between the City Sports and FedEx Kinko's buildings, near Brown University, as a cut-through, said Acting Battalion Fire Chief Jeffrey Varone.

But she got stuck in the 8- to 9-inch gap between the buildings, Varone said, and she was trapped, her body horizontal and about two feet off the ground.

The rescuers began smashing a hole through the concrete wall at the Fedex Kinko's building to try pulling her through, said Varone.

As Malloy tried to wriggle herself out, firefighter Bert Ledoux got into the alley from the back door of the Sharks Bar and Grille and pulled her free, Varone said.

Malloy appeared to be intoxicated, according to a police report, and although she had no visible injuries, she was taken to the hospital to be checked.

For her part, Malloy was unable to explain how she ended up stuck between the buildings, the police said.

One day, while a blonde was out driving her car, she ran into a truck.  The truck's driver made her pull over into a parking lot and get out of the car.  He took a piece of chalk and drew a circle on the pavement. He told her to stand in the middle and not leave the circle.  Furious, he went over to her car and slashed the tires.  The blonde started laughing.  This made the man angrier so he smashed her windshield.  This time the blonde laughed even harder.  Livid, the man broke all her windows and keyed her car.  The blonde is now laughing hysterically, so the truck driver asks her what's so funny.  The blonde giggles and replies, "When you weren't looking, I stepped out of the circle three times!"


Woman thinks there is nothing wrong with calling for Obama's assassination

With one Facebook status update on election night, a California woman went from Cold Stone Creamery employee in the forgettable town of Turlock, CA to infamous racist under investigation by the Secret Service. On her Facebook page, 22-year-old Denise Helms referred to President Barack Obama as "the nigger" and expressed hope that a second term would conclude with his assassination.

Despite losing her job as an ice cream scooper in a suburban strip mall once her racial slurs went viral on Twitter, Helms cluelessly stuck by her words. When Sacramento-based Fox 40 News came calling, she told a reporter, "I didn't think it would be that big of a deal.

In the wake of the news coverage, Helms deleted the original Facebook post, only to follow it with another update that didn't really help anything:

"So apparently my post last night about Obama got onto Twitter and Fox 40 came and interviewed me cause apparently a lot of people in Sacramento think I'm crazy and racist. WOW is all I got to say!! I'm not racist and I'm not crazy. just simply stating my opinion."
 On her Facebook page, Helms also "liked" the Romney/Ryan 2012 campaign, although that is not quite the same as actually voting for a candidate. The Modesto Bee reports that Helms does not actually appear on the state voter registry.

There is just no place for this kind of stuff in a democratic society.  Wishing death on politicians you don't agree with is not very mature and could be treason.  I've hated many politicians, even worked for some.  I respect their views even if I don't agree with them.


Did you know that Obama campaigned telling women If they vote for Romney, they’ll forced to go to rape camps

Seriously Fox News people are out of their minds.  Forget about objectivity, they just make shit up.

Judge blocks bid to prosecute dead man

A bizarre legal bid to prosecute a dead man has been thrown out by a judge in New Zealand, who said the case resembled the famous Monty Python comedy sketch involving a dead parrot. The case of two Korean trawler officers accused of dumping fish at sea was called at Christchurch District Court. But while the skipper of Oyang 77, Dae Jun Lee, appeared in the dock, his co-accused was not present.

Lawyer Mike Sullivan said he was representing the estate of Soon Ill Hwang, 42, who died in a car crash in China after charges were laid against him earlier this year. Mr Sullivan told Judge Gary Macaskill that it was an "unusual case'' because the prosecution, the Ministry for Primary Industries (MPI), wanted to bring a case against his deceased client.

He added that Hwang never appeared in court - and even said he may have died unaware that he had been charged. Lawyer for MPI, Grant Fletcher told the judge that "there are still reasons for this prosecution to go ahead''. But a bemused Judge Macaskill replied flatly: "We can't try dead people.''

The judge said the idea was "absurd'', sarcastically suggesting that evidence from the accused could perhaps be gleaned via seance. "It reminds me of the Monty Python sketch with the dead parrot,'' he said. He threw out the suggestion that a dead man could be tried, and suggested that if the MPI wanted to take it further, they could appeal his decision through the High Court. "I think the law is absolutely clear and I'm not going to spend two or three hours dealing with that,'' Judge Macaskill said.

Flashback Friday - Seals and Croft

Please remember it's National Hoarders week

Thursday, November 08, 2012

Jeff Kent gets booted off of Survivor

I'm not ashamed to admit I still watch Survivor.  Prefer that over Honey Boo Boo or Snooki.

So last night was a classic episode.  Jeff Kent, an ex-baseball player has been lurking around for weeks.  I know one person recognized him but it seems the rest were oblivious to the fact that he was already a millionaire several times over.

Kent had a reputation for being an asshole so I've been waiting for weeks for him to cut loose. It never really happened but the competitive ballplayer sure came out.  He wanted to win...real bad!

So last night when he got blindsided and boot off the island he was in shock.  His sound bite at the conclusion of the show was amazing.  He said that he made $60 million playing ball but he wanted to win this game and the $1 million real bad.

Couldn't have happened to a nicer guy.

How do you know if you are a narcissist

Wife doesn't vote, husband finishes in a tie for council seat

Robert McDonald learned the hard way that every vote counts.

McDonald, who is known to most people as Bobby, finished in a dead heat Tuesday with Olivia Ballou for the sixth and final seat on the Walton City Council.

Each candidate captured 669 votes, but one ballot McDonald is sure would have gone his way was never cast. His wife, Katie, who works nights as a patient care assistant at Christ Hospital and is finishing nurse’s training at Gateway Community and Technical College, didn’t make it to the polls yesterday.

“If she had just been able to get in to vote, we wouldn’t be going through any of this,” McDonald said. “You never think it will come down to one vote, but I’m here to tell you that it does.”
McDonald, 27, said his wife did not want to talk about not voting.

“She feels bad enough,” McDonald said. “She worked extra hours, goes to school and we have three kids, so I don’t blame her. She woke up about ten minutes before the polls closed and asked if she should run up, but I told her I didn’t think one vote would matter.”

Unlike Ohio, where early voting has become almost commonplace, the rules for voting absentee in Kentucky are much more restrictive, so that wasn’t an option.

Boone County Clerk Kenny Brown said it appears that because of the tie, the final seat on the council will be determined by the flip of a coin.


Chiropractor has license suspended over 'intravaginal massage' allegations

A Federal Way chiropractor's license was suspended this week over charges of sexual contact with three female patients.

Greg Summers, owner of Summers Chiropractic and Massage at 2201 SW 356th St., is accused of touching three patients inappropriately, according to the state Department of Health and the Chiropractic Quality Assurance Commission.

Robert Zielke, attorney for Summers, released a statement:

"Dr. Summers denies the allegations as baseless. Anyone can file a complaint against a doctor event when the complaint is not accurate or not actionable. Here, the charges were issued without the (Department of Health) having heard Dr. Summer's testimony and without his opportunity to present contradictory evidence."

The first incident allegedly took place in March or April 2010. According to a statement of charges, Summers inserted his fingers into a patient's vagina "for the alleged purposes of massaging the patient internally to prevent scar tissue from forming and to alleviate pain."

That patient was also an employee at the clinic and was required to provide massages to Summers in training sessions, according to documents. During those sessions, Summers allegedly talked about his marital issues and how he would "offer his body" as a teaching tool on "how to get a man hard," according to documents.

A second patient ended treatment at the clinic after Summers allegedly touched her breasts during a chiropractic treatment session in September 2010. He is also accused of altering the patient's medical records after she filed a complaint.

A third patient, who began seeking treatment at the clinic in 1994, was undergoing treatment in April or May 2011 when Summers allegedly told her that it would be easier to massage her groin area "intravaginally," according to documents. Summers then allegedly inserted his finger into the patient's vagina.

Summers has 20 days to respond to the charges and ask for a hearing, and cannot practice in Washington until the charges are resolved, according to the health department.

 Seriously look at the moustache on this guy.  It screams pervert.  How could these women have missed the signs?  This guy borrowed his from Borat.

Ukrainian boy spends family's life savings on candy

A 9-year-old Ukrainian boy spent nearly $4,000 on candy in several days, the money coming from his parents' savings hidden in a couch.

"The disappearance [of the money] was first spotted by his father. He opened the stash and saw it was empty," said Tatyana Kushnerova of the Konotop, Ukraine police department.

After an argument, the son admitted taking the money during his autumn school holiday, $3,300 in U.S. cash and about 600 euros ($635), converting it to Ukrainian hryvnas with the help of an adult acquaintance and spending it on candy, which he shared with friends, the Russian news agency RIA Novosti reported Wednesday.

One of those classic cases where if you asked a kid what would he do if he had $4,000 all he could think of was Snicker bars and Good & Plenty candy.  This is why you keep money away from kids.

I hate Gary Bettman week

Wednesday, November 07, 2012

Who the Blue Jays should go after

I'm hoping Alex Anthopolous is going to be a busy boy these next few weeks.  We all have waited long enough and it's time that the Jays contend.  The Red Sox are rebuilding, the Yankees are getting old so what better time than now to surge ahead.

For the Jays to contend they need to fill some big holes in the lineup.  Specifically then need one or two starting pitcher, a second baseman, a left fielder and it wouldn't hurt to replace Adam Lind at first/DH.  So I've compiled my wish list - players that I would love to see in a Jays uniform but as well more realistic acquisitions and finally a cheap replacement (a Jays specialty over the years).

Starting Pitching

Love to see - Zach Greinke and Anibal Sanchez

More realistic - Ryan Dempsey and Francisco Liriano

Cheap alternative - Henderson Alvarez and Chad Jenkins

Second Base

Love to see - Jeff Keppinger

More realistic - Orlando Hudson

Cheap alternative - Adeiny Hechavarria

AA's choice -  Maicer Izturis

Left Field

Love to see -Josh Hamilton

More realistic - Nick Swisher

Cheap alternative - Anthony Gose


Love to see - Adam Laroche

More realistic - Kevin Youkilis

Cheap alternative -Adam Lind

Language barrier foils robbery at Chinese restaurant

Robbery Picture

Florida credited a language barrier with foiling a trio of armed robbers who targeted a Chinese restaurant.

The Orange County Sheriff's Office said the three masked men entered the New China eatery in Orlando a little after 9 p.m. Monday and demanded three employees hand over the money from the cash register, the Orlando Sentinel reported Tuesday.

However, the employees apparently had trouble understanding the robbers. Two of the masked men pounded on the register in an attempt to open it, accidentally firing a gun in the process.

Police said the attempted robbers left without any cash and hopped a retaining wall into Woodridge Apartments. A police dog led officers to a car and three men were detained, but not officially arrested.


Woman in MIT t shirt prevented from voting because polling staff can't spell

A woman attempting to vote in West Boca Raton was initially prohibited from entering the polling place because she was wearing a t-shirt with the letters MIT.

An election supervisor at the polling place ultimately realized that MIT stands for “Massachusetts Institute of Technology” — a school where students tend to know how to spell — and was not a campaign shirt for the Republican candidate, who spells his name MITT.

Campaigning is not permitted within several yards of a polling place.

The woman was ultimately allowed to vote.


Donald Trump totally lost it last night on Twitter

I think it's Trump that has become a laughing stock.  Mature and intelligent people accept the results of an election loss and move on.  Is the American election process perfect?  No, but it seems to work and everyone knew the flaws going into the election.

I hate Gary Bettman week

Hump day hottie

Natalie Portman

Tuesday, November 06, 2012

A poor understand of rape and pregnacy will not get your elected

Bad night to be an old white Republican man with a terrible understanding of science and rape: both Richard "Rape Pregnancies Are God's Gifts" Mourdock and Todd "Legitimate Rape" Akin lost their races; Mourdock was defeated by Joe Donnelly in the Indiana Senate race, and Claire McCaskill easily beat Akin to retain her Missouri Senate spot.

The Missouri senator faced one of the most difficult challenges to get reelected in Republican Missouri, but Akin's comments moved the race in her favor.

Nude activist gets naked at Board Of Supervisors meeting (NSFW)

Let’s face it, it would’ve been weird if everyone’s clothes stayed on for the entirety of Monday’s hearing on legislation that would ban public nudity in San Francisco.

For two hours, speakers tussled over whether the Castro “naked guys” were a few harmless individuals  just expressing themselves, or a growing public nuisance that San Franciscans should no longer have to tolerate. Supervisor Scott Wiener, who represents the Castro, is proposing legislation forbidding genital exposure on city sidewalks, plazas, parklets, streets and public transit while exempting street fairs, festivals and parades.

“Over the past two years, the situation on our streets and particularly in the Castro has changed,” Wiener said. “Public nudity is no longer random and sporadic it’s no longer an occasional quirky part of San Francisco.”

Nudist activist Gypsy Taub was removed from the proceedings after she disrobed during the public comment period, standing at the lectern naked touting “body freedom” and deriding Wiener’s legislation as “fascist.”

“Down with Scott Wiener!” Taub cried before a sheriff’s deputy led her from the hearing room. In the hallway, deputies had Taub up against the wall and were holding her arms for several minutes before she agreed to put her dress back on and was led out of the building. She was not arrested or cited for violating City Hall rules against nudity in the building, Sheriff’s Department spokeswoman Susan Fahey said.

aub, who had sent out a press release to alert the media about her plans for the nude protest, had accompanied her two children to the lectern earlier as they spoke during public comment opposing the legislation.

Umm, this voting machine might be malfunctioning

Don't you wish your kids could be amused this easily

Best of Craigslist

Can we borrow your dog? - mw4mw

Date: 2012-10-25, 6:18PM PDT

Hi So

We bought some bacon and some coffee this morning but due to being drunk we seem to have misplaced it.

We are 90-93% sure it's in our house somewhere. But where? We seriously have no idea. It's driving us nuts. We just want to drink some coffee and eat some freaking bacon. If you have a dog that likes smelling and finding bacon we would love to have him over. We will even feed you bacon once it's found. PleAse help

EDIT: it was in our couch. this took several hours and moments of hard thought. We still love dogs and welcome you and yours.

Rabbi blames Hurricane Sandy on gay marriage

Rabbi Noson Leiter of Torah Jews for Decency is blaming Hurricane Sandy on gays and lesbians, calling it “divine justice” for New York’s new marriage equality law. Torah Jews for Decency campaigned against marriage equality in New York and New Jersey, worked with Liberty Counsel and New Yorkers for Constitutional Freedoms in an unsuccessful lawsuit to overturn New York’s marriage law, and has joined with various other Religious Right groups on anti-gay campaigns.

Leiter appeared on Crosstalk, the flagship program of Vic Eliason’s Voice of Christian Youth America, alongside Neil DiCarlo, a candidate for New York State Senate, to discuss New York’s legalization of same-sex marriage.

Leiter asserted that the “the Great Flood in the time of Noah was triggered by the recognition of same-gender marriages,” adding that there are similar “messages in this particular storm for us.” “The Lord will not bring another flood to destroy the entire world but He could punish particular areas with a flood, and if we look at the same-gender marriage recognition movement that’s occurring, that certainly is a message for us to learn,” he said. “We have to learn that the Lord does watch what we do and if we don’t shape up He will deliver divine justice.” Leiter also suggested that God flooded Lower Manhattan because it is “one of the national centers of homosexuality.”

Entrepreneurs selling gas in NY and NJ and they aren't offering money

Even among the dispair in battered New York and New Jersey there are still horny men willing to help people out - for a blow job.

Judge orders woman who drove on sidewalk to wear idiot sign

An Ohio judge has ordered a woman caught on video passing a school bus by driving on the sidewalk to wear a sign proclaming that she is an “idiot.”

Shena Hardin, 32, plead out on Monday in order to avoid facing a trial. Back in September, she plead not guilty to charges of not stopping for a school bus and reckless operation.

A bus driver had noticed Hardin’s pattern along a Cleveland street so he notified the school district and had his cell phone camera rolling during one of her episodes. The portion of sidewalk she used to avoid the bus was the entrance to a day care.

Police set up a sting to catch her on her makeshift detour and cited her on Sept. 11.

As part of her sentence from Cleveland Municipal Court, Hardin must wear a sign that says, “Only an idiot would drive on the sidewalk to avoid the school bus.”


Guys, when's the last time you saw your junk?

 Fellas, you're chillingly aware, no doubt, of what goes down when cold water contacts your most precious appendage: "shrinkage."

Now, some obesity watchdogs are worried that you may be too plump to see your own private parts, a.k.a: "blockage."

This fall, British health advocates surveyed 1,000 U.K. males and found that 33 percent of guys between 35 and 60 years old possess guts so rotund, their bellies form a full eclipse of their genitalia when the men stand and take a gander down south. This blubbery blind spot leaves such men more likely to develop Type 2 diabetes, colon cancer, heart disease and other health problems, recent research has shown. The group conducted the poll.

In fact, the wellness and marketing experts behind that website recently launched a national campaign in England, using that crude-yet-quick assessment to urge bulging boys to adopt immediate lifestyle changes. They've dubbed it "The Big Check."  And here we thought the Brits were so stuffy.

Finally health advice that men can understand.  And you don't need to go to your doctor's office or a lab to conduct this test, you can do it yourself. So simple, can you see your junk? This could save lives.


Looks like this GOP Senate candidate stole Stephen Harper's robocall trick

According to a report by Phoenix, Arizona’s NBC affiliate, Rep. Jeff Flake’s (R-AZ) U.S. Senate campaign called Democratic voters telling them to vote in the wrong precinct — in some cases as much as 11 miles away from their actual polling place. After telling the Democratic voters to vote in the wrong place, the calls also encourage the voter to “vote Flake for U.S. Senate.” Watch the report:

It’s unclear whether these calls were made accidentally or as part of an intentional strategy to depress the Democratic vote.  No where have we heard this one before?  Could it be in last year's Canadian federal election.

Sign of the day

I hate Gary Bettman week

Monday, November 05, 2012

Maybe the hockey lockout can be resolved over the next 2 weeks

I've continually said the NHL owners and players have not been very far apart.  The problem has been that neither side chose posturing to the media over negotiations.  Now it seems that real negotiations is taking place.

We know that both the players and owners had already agreed to a 50:50 split in some form.  It's just that they were far apart on how to get there.  It seems that what has gotten things moving is the NHL signalling that it would be willing to move on the players' proposed make-whole provisions. Whether this means that players' contracts will be honoured fully is unknown. 

Should the players win on this issue it will be a bit of a blow to teams that went on a signing spree right before the lockout began.  The only explanation for signing those contracts before the lockout would be to lock in players who thought they were getting a certain number of dollars only to have to pay them something less.  If those players will now be worth less under the new CBA but fully paid then the winners will be the teams that waited, like Toronto.

Even if the economic issues are resolved this week, there are still a lot of other issues to be worked through such as free agency, maximum length of contracts, salary cap, minimum floor, etc.  That's why this may take a couple of weeks.  Would be nice to have hockey by American Thanksgiving.

Would you vote for someone named Shmuley Boteach?

Did you know Barry Obama is more white than Mitt Romney?

Sign of the day

I hate Gary Bettman week